Isolation Media 101: CBS All Access
Good news, anyone who wants to watch Picard (or every other Star Trek property that doesn’t star Chris Pine) - you can get a free month of CBS All Access right now.
For anyone who isn’t interested in watching Star Trek shows, I have a list for you. I’ll admit, I’m interested in Picard because I love Patrick Stewart so much, but I wanted to see what else CBS had to offer on their streaming platform.
Movie wise, pickings were a bit slim so I snuck in a few one season tv shows for some distractions as well. I was impressed by the majority of the things I watched - especially because going into this, the only thing I was excited about was the ten episodes of Why Women Kill, which definitely didn’t disappoint.
Win a Date with Tad Hamilton
I remember desperately wanting to watch this movie when it came out and it seemed right up my alley. Watching it now, so many years after it came out, I’m just slack-jawed at Ginnifer Goodwin’s hair choices and how much they roll with the ‘nice guy’ trope in a way that made me want to scream. Not sure this one ages super well by any means.
The Verdict: 2.5/5
Spider-Man
I don’t know why only one of the Tobey Maguire Spider-Man films were available, but I realized I’ve never seen them in full and decided to give it a shot. No joke, I knocked off two stars solely for the fact that in no universe do I even come close to believing that this version of Peter Parker is a high schooler. Plus, superhero films have come so far that almost any older comic book film is a bit cringy.
The Verdict: 2/5
The Craft
I’m a bit chicken when it comes to horror movies, so I will warn that there is a scene with a huge number of creepy crawly kinds of animals towards the end that overwhelmed me. Other than that, I actually really appreciated the creativity of this movie. I couldn’t compare it too many films, and I really appreciated that. It held my interest and the effects weren’t bad for a movie as old as it is.
The Verdict: 3/5
Something’s Gotta Give
I figured a Nancy Meyers movie was the perfect distraction for a world that is a bit scary and while I wasn’t wrong, I think I’d have to find one that didn’t star Jack Nicholson. I found a lot of his love story a bit cringy and while I normally like Diane Keaton, she made me wince often - especially in any scenes that required her to weep uncontrollably. However, I was here for the semi-surprise young Keanu Reeves.
The Verdict: 3/5
Stand By Me
I had to text a friend to confirm that even though Stephen King’s name was attached to this, I’d be able to sleep at night. This was truly not like any King project I’ve ever seen. There was definitely a more serious aspect to it, but it felt more like a picture of teenage boy friendship, and in such an interesting and organic way. It felt like the more crass version of the Stranger Things gang, and I was definitely here for it.
The Verdict: 3.5/5
Funny Girl
Once again, I was pursuing an older film with a slight nervousness I wouldn’t like it without nostalgia attached. And once again (a la my experience with The Sound of Music), my anxiety was proven completely wrong. I was infatuated with almost every minute, which is saying something for a 2.5 hour older musical. I was able to get references to this movie I’d heard before, and Babs was fully killing it. Would definitely rewatch.
The Verdict: 4/5
Rachel Getting Married
All I knew about this movie was that it was Anne Hathaway’s character being a bit angry and out of rehab. I wasn’t too far off - that’s the plot. And she is not the titular Rachel who is getting married. I thought it was an interesting, creative movie, but this movie was far too long and spent too much time on very inconsequential scenes and semi-monologues that didn’t add much to the story.
The Verdict: 3.5/5
Why Women Kill
This! This is why I pursued this streaming service in the first place. And I was beyond thrilled by it. Based on the previews I’d constantly been served, I thought I knew what I was getting into, but I was pleasantly surprised. The only thing that I was correct about was that it was the story of three relationships and three murders that took place in one house over three different time periods. From there, it just keeps twisting.
The Verdict: 4.5/5
Love Island (USA)
Somehow, as I’m getting closer to 30, I’m developing the occasional taste for trash reality television. A friend recommended this (but the UK version) ages ago so when I saw this, I figured I’d give it a try. it was exactly what I needed - mindless crazy drama that would not ever happen in the ‘real world’ and a confusing amount of emotional investment in people you’ve never - and will never - meet.
The Verdict: 2.5/5
Angel From Hell
Jane Lynch is always a win in my book, so when I saw there was a 13 episode, half hour comedy show featuring her as a guardian angel, I was sold. After finishing it, I was definitely bummed that it was cancelled so early on - as it was obvious that they weren’t intending it to be a one-off. But it was a cute, five or so hour comedy distraction, though it was hard to care when you knew you wouldn’t get to see it all play out.
The Verdict: 3/5
Okay! CBS is all taken care of - next, I’m off to Hulu!