Baking & the Big Screen: Breadsticks & Moonstruck
The combinations I’m having to come up with now for this series really cracks me up. I’m very aware that the gluten-filled products in Moonstruck are baguettes, but I’ve done those before and breadsticks sounded close enough, and also like something I really wanted to make. I didn’t expect to be able to put a movie like this into a baking series, which seems to be a trend lately. After a few years, it’s gotta get more creative. I can’t wait to see what weirdo baked goods I’ll be left with in a year or so.
Moonstruck
Starring Cher, Nicolas Cage, Olympia Dukakis
Director: Norman Jewison
Released in 1987
Available on HBO Max
I got exactly what I expected when I put on a romantic comedy starring Cher and Nic Cage, but what shocked me was how far off I was from the critical and popular reception of this film. I laughed so hard so often and later realized that may not have been the goal. The acting is over the top. The drama is utterly insane. The pseudo-Italian accents everyone in this film insists on using seem like caricatures. And yet somehow, this is described as a wonderful movie by everyone other than me. So, Cher is engaged to a guy that she doesn’t seem to really give a crap about, and before he goes to Italy to spend time with his seemingly-on-her-death-bed mother before she passes, he requests that Cher go see his estranged brother to get him to come to their wedding. I do not fully understand how or why this is occurring. Why would she be able to do it? Why can’t the brother do it? Shouldn’t we be judging the estranged brother for not also running to his ailing mother?
None of these questions are answered for me. And naturally, when Cher goes to see said estranged brother, played by Cage, of course, they immediately fall in love despite seemingly not even remotely liking one another. The lead-up to their hook up is beyond ridiculous, to the extent that I was all but looking around the room at the nonexistent people with me in shock that this was supposed to be considered a sexy relationship. Instead, it felt like a spiritual partner to The Room, with the exact same level of nonexistent chemistry and ridiculousness. Giving this movie 2.5 stars almost seems too generous based on how much I disliked it, but I suspect the actors were doing just what they’re told, and I can’t begrudge them that. I will, however, never be watching this film again, ironically or otherwise.
Now, for the good news: these breadsticks rock. We’re going to just skip past the part where I acknowledge how phallic these things look and discuss the taste. They are just barely too dense to me to be true dupes of the Olive Garden specialty, which is something I struggle with in a lot of my bakes, specifically bread and pastries. They are equally as addicting as the real thing, and I had to put them in the freezer so they’ll be out of sight and out of mind and I won’t inhale them all in a weekend. The ease of this recipe is also something to be admired. Other than having to factor in 2+ hours for rising time, it’s one of the easiest and least time-intensive recipes I’ve made, especially for something as truly delicious as this. I may not revisit Moonstruck, but I definitely will be making these again and again.